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CHRISTIAN HOME BIBLE STUDIES

CHRISTIAN HOME BIBLE STUDIES

ULTIMATE  POWER GOSPEL  ASSEMBLY

A.K.A. COVENANT OF POWER EVANGELICAL MINISTRIES [COPEM]

Website: www.ultimatepower.org         E. Mail:ultimatepowergospelassembly@gmail.com

…IGNITING THE FIRE OF APOSTOLIC SIGNS AND WONDERS

BIBLE STUDY OUTLINE

                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   1

The Sanctity Of Marriage

 

INTRODUCTION

-              Marriage as an institution today is struggling:

1.  Many seek to redefine what constitutes a marriage. We hear of same-sex marriages,     polygamy, Polyandry.

2.    Others decry marriage altogether, preferring simple cohabitation

 3.    Many joke about it: Marriage is a wonderful institution.  But who would want to live in an institution?

-              The family as an institution today is struggling:

   a. Husbands and wives often suffer strained relationships

   b. Parents and children are frequently at odds with one another

   c. Much misery in life is due to dysfunctional family relations

   d. Some prefer that government assume the role of raising children

-              Much of the problem is due to self-centeredness in our  society.

   a. People are told to "look out for #1" in all their relations(business, family, etc.). Thus many enter marriage and start families with selfish attitudes

   b. Yet no relationship can exist peacefully and lovingly with selfish participants

-              The Bible has much to say about marriage and family. Especially in the teachings of Jesus and His apostles, that has helped many to have long-lasting, fulfilling relationships which can affect both our temporal and eternal happiness.

 

I. THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE DEFINED

 

   A. THE MEANING OF SANCTITY.

      1. Sanctity is defined as the quality of being holy, sacred

      2. Thus it is common to speak of "holy matrimony" (i.e., sacred marriage)

 

   B. THE SACREDNESS OF MARRIAGE.

      1. Marriage is one of the holiest of relations two people can have

      2. Marriage is a bond created by God Himself, thus we must treat it as sacred

      3. Marriage is not something to be entered into lightly

      4. Our nation must defend the sanctity of marriage.

 

II. THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE DELINEATED

   A. MARRIAGE WAS INSTITUTED BY GOD.

      1. From the very beginning, following the Creation - Mt 19:3-4;  Gen 2:18-24

      2. Designed for those created as male and female ,whose union becomes "one flesh" (produce offspring) - Mt 19:4-5

      -- Marriage is not a creation of the state, but of God Himself!

 

   B. MARRIAGE IS REGULATED BY JESUS.

      -  Jesus has been given all authority, will be our Judge in all things - Mt 28:18; 2Co 5:10

      -   He taught that man may try to put asunder, but only God puts asunder - Mt 19:7-9

         a. One may legally divorce and remarry, but adultery can still occur - Mt 5:31-32

         b. God allows divorce only for fornication, and remarriage by the innocent - Mt 19:9

      -  He taught some might have to remain celibate ("make themselves eunuchs") for the sake of the kingdom of heaven - Mt 19:11-12

         a. Perhaps because they had been divorced for adultery or unlawfully married

         b. Or because they were single by choice, or never asked to bemarried

      -  His apostle Paul had more to say concerning marriage

         a. Marriage is for life; marrying another while one’s spouse is alive is adultery - Ro 7:1-4

         b. Each person is to have his or her own spouse, not shared     - 1Co 7:2

         c. Husbands and wives have certain duties toward one another  - 1Co 7:3-5

         d. One is not to divorce; if divorced, must remain single or  return to spouse - 1Co 7:10-11

         e. If an unbelieving spouse departs, a believer is not obligated to fulfill marital duties (but that does not necessarily imply they are free to remarry) -  1Co 7:3-5, 12-16

      -- Jesus as Lord over all is the final authority regarding marriage!

 

   C. MARRIAGE IS RESERVED FOR INTIMACY.

      1. The only proper relationship for sexual intimacy (intercourse) is marriage - He 13:4

-  Not before the wedding, during courtship, but only after the wedding

      2. Sex outside marriage (between a man and a woman) is fornication

-  Fornication includes pre-marital, extra-marital, or same-sex relations. Such conduct can keep one out of the kingdom of God -     1Co 6:9-10

      3. Sex outside marriage is not without physical and psychological consequence-  1Co 6:16

      4. Pre-marital sex endangers having a successful marriage

- Couples who have more sexual partners prior to or outside of  marriage have a much higher rate of divorce

      5. A successful marriage requires mutual respect and trust

    -  Courtship is the time to build respect and trust which will strengthen your marriage. If your potential spouse will sin with you before you marry, what assurance do you have they will not sin against you after you marry?

      -- The sanctity of marriage is preserved when it alone is the realm of sexual intimacy!

CONCLUSION

- Marriage is not an institution   a. Created and designed by man or the state   b. Subject to alteration by societal whims. Marriage is a sacred institution.

   a. Instituted by God in the beginning

   b. Regulated by Jesus and His apostles in the Word of God

   c. Reserved for sexual intimacy between a man and a women

3. Marriage is a successful institution   a. When we follow the Biblical injunctions concerning it

   b. When members of the family fulfill their proper roles.

ULTIMATE  POWER GOSPEL  ASSEMBLY

A.K.A. COVENANT OF POWER EVANGELICAL MINISTRIES [COPEM]

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…IGNITING THE FIRE OF APOSTOLIC SIGNS AND WONDERS

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                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   2

 

            The 10 Commandments of Successful Marriage

 

1. Bear and forbear.

 

2. Work together, play together, and grow up together.

 

3. Avoid the little quarrels, and the big ones will take care of  themselves.

 

4. Compromise (give and take). It is the antitoxin of divorce.

 

5. Practice sympathy, good humor and mutual understanding.

 

6. Don’t grouch before breakfast or after it.

 

7. Respect your "in-laws," but don’t criticize them or take criticism from them.

 

8. Establish your own home, even in a one room flat.

 

9. Fight for each other, but not with each other.

 

10. Build your home on religious faith, with love and forgiveness as  the watchword.

 
 The Duties Of Husbands
 
Let’s first consider the duties of husbands:
 
I. LOVE YOUR WIVES!
 
   A. HUSBANDS ARE TO LOVE THEIR WIVES.
      1. As Christ loved the church - Ep 5:25-27,29. He gave Himself for the church! He nourishes and cherishes the church!
      2. As they love their own bodies - Ep 5:28-29. Which they nourish and cherish
      3. Free from bitterness - Col 3:19. That is, resentment or hate. Often accompanied with wrath, anger, clamor, evil speaking  -  Ep 4:31
 
   B. HUSBANDS ARE TO LOVE THEIR WIVES.
    1. With "agape" love (active good will). Which is commanded - Ep 5:25 defined - 1Co 13:4-8
- The same sort of love we are to have toward God and all men
    2. With "phileo" love (sentimental, affectionate). As one would have for  his own body - Ep 5:29. As parents would have for their children - cf. Ep 6:4; 1Th  2:7
    3. With "eros" love (sexual). Joining together as one flesh - Ep 5:31. Providing physical attention and affection due the wife  -  1Co 7:2-5
 
II. RESPECT YOUR WIVES!
 
   A. BY HOW YOU TREAT THEM.
      1. With understanding - 1Pe 3:7. Be considerate 
      2. With honor - 1Pe 3:7. Praise her in the gates -  Pr 31:28. Do not ridicule her publicly
      3. As to the weaker vessel - 1Pe 3:7
         a. Not that your wife may actually be the weaker vessel
         b. Many wives are spiritually stronger, some physically stronger
         c. But treat her "as" a weaker vessel 
 
   B. BY HOW YOU VIEW THEM.
      1. As a fellow heir of the grace of life - 1Pe 3:7. A beloved sister in Christ, worthy of respect    with whom you hope to spend eternity
      2. As one who affects the efficacy of your prayers! - 1Pe 3:7
         a. How we treat others has a bearing on our prayers - Mk 11:26;  Pr 21:13
         b. God will not heed our prayers if we mistreat our wives!  -  Mal 2:13-16
 
III. SUPPORT YOUR WIVES!
 
   A. BY PROVIDING FOR THE FAMILY.
      1. The husband (and father) has the duty to provide for his family   - 1Ti 5:8. Failure to do so is to deny the faith (the doctrine of Christ!)
      2.  A man should not take a wife unless he is willing and able to  support her financially
 
   B. BY LETTING HER CONTRIBUTE.
      1. The virtuous woman contributed much to the support of the family - Pr 31:16-19,24
      2. A wise husband lets her contribute, and to be praised for it!   - Pr 31:31
      3. Of course, not to the neglect of her familial duties - cf. Pr 31:21,27; 1Ti 5:14; Tit 2:4-5
 
CONCLUSION
1. The Christian husband is a man who:
   a. Loves his wife in every way
   b. Respects his wife by how he treats her and views her
   c. Supports his wife financially, emotionally, and spiritually
2. This is because the Christian husband is a man who...
   a. Is a Christian first, and a husband second
   b. Gladly accepts the Biblical injunctions given to him as a husband
   c. Looks to the Word of God and prayer for the strength he needs to fulfill his duty

ULTIMATE  POWER GOSPEL  ASSEMBLY

A.K.A. COVENANT OF POWER EVANGELICAL MINISTRIES [COPEM]

Website: www.ultimatepower.org         E. Mail:ultimatepowergospelassembly@gmail.com

…IGNITING THE FIRE OF APOSTOLIC SIGNS AND WONDERS

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                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   3

 
                    The 10 Commandments of Husbands
1. You shalt not take your wife for granted, but will honor and respect her as your equal. (1Pe 3:7)
2. Your highest allegiance, except God, shall be to your wife, not relatives or friends. (Gen 2:24)
3. You shall frequently tell her how important & valuable she is to you.   (Php 2:3; Pr 31:10-11)
4. You shall hold your wife’s love by the same means that you won it.  (So 5:10-16)
5. You shall actively establish family discipline with your wife's help.   (Ep 6:4)
6. Remember to do all the little things for your wife when you say you  will. (Mt 5:37)
7. Keep your eyes on your own wife, not your neighbor’s. (Pr 5:15-20;  Job 31:1; Jer 5:8)
8. You shall make every effort to see things from your wife’s point of  view. (Gen 21:12)
9. You shall never raise your hand to beat your wife.
10. You shall not be stingy with your wife when it comes to money.
    
The Duties Of Wives
 
INTRODUCTION
 
- Previously, we considered the duties of husbands, who are  commanded to :
   a. Love their wives   b. Respect their wives   c. Support their wives
- Now let us consider what the inspired apostles of Christ taught were the duties of wives, beginning with one that seems to offend many today.
 
I. SUBMIT TO YOUR HUSBANDS!
 
   A. DEFINING THE WORD "SUBMIT".
      1. The Greek word is hupotasso - to subordinate, to obey
      2. To be under obedience, in subjection to, submit self unto
      3. To submit to the orders or directives of someone 
      4. An example:  Jesus submitting to the will of His Father - Jn 6:38
 
   B. WIVES ARE TO SUBMIT TO THEIR HUSBANDS.
      1. As the church submits to Christ, in everything - Ep 5:22-24
         a. Presuming that it is in keeping with the will of God - Ac 5:29
         b. For husbands must not abuse their authority - 1Pe 3:7
         c. Indeed, husbands are to love their wives as Christ loves the church - Ep 5:25-27
      2. Even as Christians wives are to submit to:  a. God - Jm 4:17  b. Their masters - 1Pe 2:18; 3:1  c. Their elders - He 13:17; 1Pe 5:5
      3. Without nagging, with gentleness and quietness - 1Pe 3:1-4
      4. With respect, even as Sarah respected Abraham - 1Pe 3:5-6;   Ep 5:33
 
   C. WHEN WIVES FAIL TO SUBMIT.
      1. It is not fitting in the Lord - Col 3:18 - to pertain to what is due, duty, as was fitting
- In keeping with Jesus' own teaching and example -  Mt 20:25-28
      2. The family unit will often be in turmoil
         a. To have a social organization that is functional, you must  have some chain of authority
         b. God is the head of Christ, Christ the head of man, man the head of woman - 1Co 11:3
         c. In the family, it is God’s Will the husband be the head of the wife, and that parents be over their children - otherwise, the family will be dysfunctional
      3. God will not be gracious to them - 1Pe 5:5
         a. God gives grace to those who humbly submit
         b. He will not grant favor to those who proudly resist His will
         c. Just the prayers of a husband who mistreats and disrespects  his wife are hindered, so the prayers of a wife who refuses to submit to her husband! -  1Pe 3:7
 
II. LOVE YOUR HUSBANDS!
 
   A. WITH AFFECTION.
      1. "admonish the young women to love their husbands" - Tit 2:4
      2. This affection is something that can be taught (learned); if needed, seek advice from a mature sister in Christ - Tit 2:3-4
 
   B. WITH INTIMACY.
      1. To prevent unfaithfulness - 1Co 7:2
      2. Rendering affection properly due, not withholding marital rights- 1Co 7:3-4
      3. Abstaining only with mutual consent, for the purpose of prayer   - 1Co 7:5
 
III. MANAGE THE HOME!
   A. AS HOMEMAKERS.
      1. "to be discrete, chaste, homemakers, good" - Tit 2:5 - "a stayer at home, i.e. domestically
            inclined" . "one who works in the home - 'one who takes care of the home, homemaker.'"                 2. "manage the house" - 1Ti 5:14 "to command and give leadership to a household -- to direct            a household, to manage a home.
      3. This also can be learned from older sisters in Christ - Tit  2:3-5
   B. AS MOTHERS.
      1. Note the instructions for young widows: "marry, bear children"   - 1Ti 5:14
CONCLUSION
1. The Christian wife is a woman who:   a. Submits to her husband with respect   b. Loves her husband with affection   c. Manages her home and her children
2. This is because the Christian wife is a woman who   a. Is a Christian first, and a wife second
   b. Gladly accepts the Biblical injunctions given her as a wife   c. Looks to the Word of God and prayer for the strength she needs to fulfill her duty

ULTIMATE  POWER GOSPEL  ASSEMBLY

A.K.A. COVENANT OF POWER EVANGELICAL MINISTRIES [COPEM]

Website: www.ultimatepower.org         E. Mail:ultimatepowergospelassembly@gmail.com

…IGNITING THE FIRE OF APOSTOLIC SIGNS AND WONDERS

BIBLE STUDY OUTLINE

                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   4

 
                     The 10 Commandments of Wives
 
1. You must never compare your husband with another man.
2. You shall work hard to build your house with the husband that you have, not fantasizing about "the one that could have been". (Pr 14:1)
3. You shall not na or hit him for any reason. (Pr 27:15; 21:19)
4. You shall coddle your husband and be a warm wife. (1Co 7:3-5)
5. Remember that the frank approval of your husband is more to you than the side glances of many strangers. (Eze 16:32; 2Pe 2:14)
6. You shall not yell at your husband but will behave with a gentle and quiet spirit. (1Pe 3:1-4)
7. Permit no one to take over your responsibility towards your husband. 
8. You shall not fail to please  him, as you did before marriage. (So 4:9-11)
9. You shall submit to your husband from your heart and allow him to be  head of the household. (Col 3:18; 1Pe 3:6; Ep 5:33)
10. You shal respect and treat all your husband’s relatives well.
 
The Duties Of Parents
 
INTRODUCTION
 
-          God’s purpose for marriage is to create families in which children have the benefit of parents who provide the best upbringing possible.  For this to occur, parents must fulfill their duties:
 
I. THE DUTIES OF FATHERS
 
   A. PROVIDE LIFE’S NECESSITIES.
      -  Parents ought to provide for their children - 2Co 12:14
      -  A man who fails to do so for his family is worse than an  infidel - 1Ti 5:8
 
   B. DO NOT PROVOKE CHILDREN TO WRATH.
      - This admonition found twice in the Scriptures - Ep 6:4; Col  3:21. By unreasonable commands; by needless severity; by the manifestation of anger.
      -  Lest by your continually finding fault with them, they should lose all courage, and despair of ever pleasing you.
   C. PROVIDE SPIRITUAL TRAINING.
      1. In the training (discipline,) and admonition (instruction) of the Lord - Ep 6:4
      2. Training by way of instruction - e.g., Deut 6:6-7; 32:46; Ps 78:4-6
      -  Note that the Word must first be in the father’s heart. Then the father can lead his family like Joshua led his family -  Jos 24:14-15
      3. Training by way of example - considering the following:  When the father is an active believer, there is about a seventy-five percent likelihood that the children will also become active  believers. But if only the mother is a believer, this likelihood is dramatically reduced to fifteen percent.
 
   D. PROVIDE LOVING DISCIPLINE.
- Even as our heavenly Father disciplines His children - He12:6-10. Even though it may be unpleasant at times - He 12:11;  Pr 13:24
 
II. THE DUTIES OF MOTHERS
 
   A. LOVE THEIR CHILDREN.
- As older women were to admonish younger women - Tit 2:4
   B. MANAGE THEIR HOUSEHOLDS.
      -A primary responsibility of the wife and mother - Tit 2:5; 1Ti  5:14
- An important quality of the virtuous woman - Pr 31:10-31
   C. PROVIDE SPIRITUAL TRAINING.
   -  Especially when male leadership is lacking. As seen in the case of Timothy. His faith positively influenced by his grandmother and mother -   2Ti 1:5
    -  Too often, fathers neglect spiritual training, leaving mothers to pick up the slack
CONCLUSION
1. Blessed are the homes in which:
   a. Fathers fulfill their duties as Christian men
   b. Mothers fulfill their duties as Christian women
2. No home is perfect, and as fathers and mothers we often fall short...
   a. But with God’s grace and mercy, let us do the best we can
   b. Let us give our children the guidance that they may succeed where   we have failed
- Finally, some food for thought:  Seven Ways To Impact Your Child’s Faith
1. Model a growing and personal faith. [If they don’t see it, they won’t  catch it.]
 
2. Include faith in normal conversations.
 
3. Be well-rounded. [Don’t compartmentalize your faith.]
 
4. Be authentic.
 
5. Serve together
 
6. Pray for your children and with them.
 
7. Learn and communicate love in their language.

  ULTIMATE  POWER GOSPEL  ASSEMBLY

A.K.A. COVENANT OF POWER EVANGELICAL MINISTRIES [COPEM]

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…IGNITING THE FIRE OF APOSTOLIC SIGNS AND WONDERS

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                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   5

 The Duties Of Children
 
INTRODUCTION
 
- In previous lessons on the Christian home and family, we have  discussed:
   a. The sanctity of marriage   b. The duties of husbands and wives
   c. The duties of fathers and mothers
-  We now come to the duties of children, who hopefully have:
   a. Fathers who provide for them and raise them in the way of the Lord
   b. Mothers who love them and care for them as an intricate part of the household
 
I. OBEY YOUR PARENTS!
 
   A. IN THE LORD, FOR THIS RIGHT.
  - The charge as found in Ep 6:1. "in the Lord" means that this is what the Lord wants you to do.
   -  Even as Jesus Himself obeyed His parents - Lk 2:51
    -  "for this is right" implies that disobeying parents is wrong. Indeed, rebellion is as evil as witchcraft and idolatry -  1Sam 15:23
 
   B. IN ALL THINGS, FOR THIS IS WELL PLEASING TO THE LORD.
 -  The charge as found in Col 3:20. "in all things" presumes in harmony with God’s will - Ac         5:29. When children obey their parents, the Lord is pleased!
   -  The OT clearly reveals God’s displeasure when children disobey their parents, and how seriously it was taken back then -   Exo 21:15,17; Deut 21:18-21; Pr 30:17
- Children can be thankful their Christian parents do not live under the OT, but the NT!  Nonetheless, disobedience is not to be taken lightly. Nor is obeying parents to be done begrudgingly.
 
II. HONOR YOUR PARENTS!
 
   A. BOTH FATHER AND MOTHER.
  -  As charged in Ep 6:2. One of the Ten Commandments in the Law of Moses -  Exo         20:12; Deut 5:16
   -  To honor implies to love, to regard highly, to show the spirit of respect and consideration . Thus obedience to one’s parents is to be rendered in love and with respect
 
   B. TO RECEIVE THE PROMISE.
   -  The command to honor one’s parents came with a promise - Ep  6:2-3. "that it may be well with you and you may live long on the  earth." -  Deut 5:16
     -  This promise is true in general; there are often exceptions  (e.g., Jesus). But a child who loves and respects his or her parents is more likely to benefit from them. From their wisdom, but also from God’s providential care!
   -  Disrespect your parents, you incur both their wrath and God’s as well!
 
III. SUPPORT YOUR PARENTS!
 
   A. AS TAUGHT BY JESUS.
      1. When He exposed the hypocrisy of the Pharisees’ traditions - Mk 7:6-13
      2. The command to honor one’s parents implied care by adult  children - Mk 7:11-12
      3. Thus the duty to love, respect, and care for parents never  ends!
 
   B. AS TAUGHT BY PAUL.
      1. In teaching concerning the care of widows - 1Ti 5:3-8,16
      2. Children (and grandchildren) are to repay their needy parents  - 1Ti 5:4
      3. Thus we are to provide security for our parents and  grandparents as needed
      4. Failure to do so denies the faith, and makes one worse than an infidel - 1Ti 5:8
 
CONCLUSION
 
1. The duties of children are clear:
   a. Obey your parents!   b. Honor your parents!    c. Support your parents!
 
2. Blessed is the home and family where:
   a. Husbands and wives fulfill their duties to one another
   b. Parents and children fulfill their duties to one another
 
-          Such homes and families are a common occurrence, wherever the admonitions of the Lord are taken seriously by all the members of the family...!
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   6

                    
 The Duties Of Singles
 
INTRODUCTION
 
- Lessons presented on "The Christian Home And Family" commonly:
   a. Discuss the challenges and duties of marriage and family
   b. Describe the responsibilities of spouses, parents, and children
-  In many cases, little is said concerning those who are single. Perhaps because the nuclear family is assumed to be the norm. Yet many are single for various reasons (never married, divorced, widowed)
- The Bible has much to say for those in such situations, either because of their own choice or circumstances beyond their control.  
 
I. THE UNMARRIED
 
   A. REASONS FOR NOT BEING MARRIED.
      1. For some, it may be due to circumstance
         a. Women who have never been asked to marry
         b. Men who have yet to find a woman to accept their proposal
      2. For others, it may be due to choice
         a. There are times when single may be the best choice - 1Co 7:25-28
         b. Some choose singleness in service to God - Mt 19:11-12; 1Co 7:7-8
 
   B. THE DUTIES OF THOSE UNMARRIED.
      1. Marry, if necessary to avoid fornication - 1Co 7:1-2,7-9
         a. Marriage is an honorable way to avoid fornication
         b. Of course, this presumes one has a scriptural right to marry
      2. Remain chaste, if not married - 1Co 6:9-11,18-20
         a. Sexual intimacy outside of marriage is fornication
         b. The body is to not to be used for sexual immorality
      3. Use your singleness for the Lord - 1Co 7:32-35
         a. Singles often have more time, less responsibilities
         b. Utilize your situation to serve the Lord where others cannot
 
II. THE DIVORCED
 
   A. REASONS FOR BEING DIVORCED.
      1. For some, it may be for scriptural reasons
         a. They put away their spouses for fornication - Mt 19:9
         b. Or they realized they were in an unlawful marriages -  Mk  6:18
      2. For others, it may be for unscriptural reasons
         a. They were put away for no fault of their own
         b. Or they put away their spouse for reasons other than fornication
 
   B. THE DUTIES OF THOSE DIVORCED.
      1. Return to your spouse if possible - 1Co 7:10-11
         a. In an effort to reconcile and restore the marriage
         b. Especially if the reason was not for fornication
      2. Avoid an adulterous marriage - Mt 5:31-32; Ro 7:2-3
         a. It is possible for a marriage to result in adultery
         b. Unless fornication was the cause of divorce, remarriage is adultery!
      3. Remarry only on scriptural grounds - Mt 19:9
         a. Where fornication was the cause of the divorce
         b. In which the innocent party put away the guilty party
 
III. THE WIDOWED
 
   A. THE YOUNG WIDOW.
      1. Paul counsels the young widow to marry again - 1Ti 5:14
      2. To avoid idleness, gossip, becoming a busybody - 1Ti 5:13
      3. Of course, this presumes that one is willing to marry her
 
   B. THE AGED WIDOW.
      1. To trust in God, serve Him in prayer - 1Ti 5:5
      2. Like Anna did -  Lk 2:36-38
CONCLUSION
1. Singleness, whether by choice or circumstance, can be a blessing.
   a. Freedom from care in times of distress or persecution - 1Co 7:26-28,32
   b. Freedom to serve the Lord in ways that the married cannot - 1Co 7:32-35
2. Singleness does have it disadvantages.
   a. The danger of temptation
   b. The danger of loneliness
   c. The danger of self-centeredness
3. Should you find yourself in the condition of being single:
   a. Use your freedom to serve God
   b. Watch out for dangers of being single
   c. Remember that you are in the family of God - Mk 10:29-30
-Whatever our circumstances, married or single, may we follow God’s Word and glorify Him with our families and our lives...!

ULTIMATE  POWER GOSPEL  ASSEMBLY

A.K.A. COVENANT OF POWER EVANGELICAL MINISTRIES [COPEM]

Website: www.ultimatepower.org         E. Mail:ultimatepowergospelassembly@gmail.com

…IGNITING THE FIRE OF APOSTOLIC SIGNS AND WONDERS

BIBLE STUDY OUTLINE

                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   7

Resolving Family Conflict
 
INTRODUCTION
 
-           As mentioned in our first lesson, the family as an institution today  is struggling:
   a. Husbands and wives often suffer strained relationships
   b. Parents and children are frequently at odds with one another
   c. Much misery in life is due to dysfunctional family relationships
- The good news is that much family turmoil can be resolved:
   a. When we understand the areas and reasons for potential conflict
   b. When we are willing to take simple but profound actions
 
I. CAUSES OF FAMILY CONFLICT
 
   A. MONEY.
      1. Most couples argue over bills, debt, spending, and other financial issues
      2. Parents and children argue over allowances, or the lack thereof
 
   B. CHILDREN.
      1. Discipline, diet, and other parenting issues can be sources of disagreement
      2. Having children can accentuate differences in beliefs on issues like how to discipline, who is responsible for most of the child care or what educational options to choose
 
   C. SEX.
      1. For spouses, frequency, quality, and infidelity are all common  sources of disharmony
      2. Parents struggle in guiding children through land-minds in our  sex-crazed culture
 
   D. CHORES.
      1. Many couples argue over equitable distribution of household work, and how to do it
      2. Instead of dividing household chores fairly they quibble over who did or didn't do what
 
   E. FRIENDS.
      1. What friends will be considered acceptable for spouses and children?
      2. Not all friends are helpful to relationships, some of them are toxic
 
   F. ENTERTAINMENT.
      1. What shall we do with our spare time?  Where shall we go?
      2. Different interests can threaten family relationships
 
   G. RELIGION.
      1. What shall we believe? How shall we raise the children? What holidays shall we observe?
      2. Religious differences in religion can create much conflict in the family
 
   H. RELATIVES.
      1. In-laws, grandparents, siblings, step-children, etc., can all  create stress within a family
      2. To what degree do we allow them to impact the nuclear family?
 
   I. EXPECTATIONS.
      1. We all go into marriage and family with certain expectations
      2. We expect spouses to be as mature as our parents, our standard  of living equal to theirs
      3. Unmet expectations are a major source of conflict in marriages and families
 
   J. PERSONALITIES.
      1. There are personality traits and personal habits that can doom marriages and families
      2. Even adults can suffer from "childhood arrests", and behave like selfish children
-This list is not exhaustive, but illustrates the challenges that families often face.  Even so, the solution is rather simple if we are willing to implement it.
 
II. RESOLVING FAMILY CONFLICT
 
   A. RELIGION IS THE KEY.
      1. Religious beliefs affect every area of potential conflict (children, money, friends, etc.)
      2. Agree on religion, and other problems will be easier to handle
      3. With God on your side you will have His blessing and providential aid!
      4. Ignore Him, and you face your troubles on your own!
 
   B. BEHAVE AS CHRISTIANS.
      1. Grow in the grace and knowledge of Christ
     a. Develop Christ-like qualities -  2Pe 1:5-8  b. Produce the fruit of the Spirit -  Ga 5:22-23
      2. Treat your family like brethren
         a. With lowliness, gentleness, longsuffering, forbearing with love - Ep 4:1-2; Php 2:3-4
         b. Just as loving brethren helps to ensure good days and  answered prayers -  1Pe 3:7-12
      3. Refuse to retaliate, respond with good - Mt 5:38-42  
      4. It takes two to fight, so be the bigger person
         a. If one person does the right thing, differences quickly diffuse -  Pr 15:1
         b. Proper conduct more likely encourages the other person to do likewise
 
CONCLUSION
- But when family members are willing to heed God's Word:   a. Potential problems rarely arise
   b. Conflicts are quickly abated.
- The home and family as Christ would have it can be one of the most wonderful blessings in the world...!

ULTIMATE  POWER GOSPEL  ASSEMBLY

A.K.A. COVENANT OF POWER EVANGELICAL MINISTRIES [COPEM]

Website: www.ultimatepower.org         E. Mail:ultimatepowergospelassembly@gmail.com

…IGNITING THE FIRE OF APOSTOLIC SIGNS AND WONDERS

BIBLE STUDY OUTLINE

                                       "THE CHRISTIAN HOME AND FAMILY"   8

   The Tragedy Of Divorce

 
INTRODUCTION
-  Our previous study listed many potential causes of family conflict  that often
   a. Strain the best of families   b. Lead many to believe divorce is an easy solution
-  In the Bible, we read that God hates divorce... - Mal 2:13-16
   a. It "covers one's garment with violence"   b. It is "treacherous"     
I. THE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN
   A. MENTALLY.
      1. Teenagers in single-parent families and in blended families are three times more likely to need psychological help within a  given year. 
      2. Compared to children from homes disrupted by death, children  from divorced homes have more psychological problems.
      3. The study of children six years after a parental marriage breakup revealed that even after all that time, these children tended to be lonely, unhappy, anxious and insecure". 
   B. SOCIALLY.
      1. Children of divorce, particularly boys, tend to be more aggressive toward others than those children whose parents did not divorce.
      2. Children of divorce are four times more likely to report problems with peers and friends than children whose parents have kept their marriages intact.
      3. Seventy percent of long-term prison inmates grew up in broken homes. 
   C. ACADEMICALLY.
      1. Studies in the early 1980s showed that children in repeat divorces earned lower grades and their peers rated them as less pleasant to be around. 
      2. Children of divorced parents are roughly two times more likely  to drop out of high school than their peers who benefit from living with parents who did not divorce. 
   D. PHYSICALLY.
      1. Children living with both biological parents are 20 to 35  percent more physically healthy than children from broken homes.
      2. Following divorce, children are fifty percent more likely to develop health problems than two parent families
      3. Children of divorce are at a greater risk to experience injury, asthma, headaches and speech defects than children whose parents have remained married. 
      4. Most victims of child molestation come from single-parent households or are the children of drug ring members
      5. A child in a female-headed home is 10 times more likely to be beaten or murdered.
      6. People who come from broken homes are almost twice as likely to attempt suicide than those who do not come from broken homes.
   E. SPIRITUALLY.
      1. Religious worship, which has been linked to better health, longer marriages, and better family life, drops after the  parents divorce
      2. Many young people from divorced families "experience a loss of trust that affects their belief in God - making them overall  much less religious than their peers from intact families," 
      3. Children of divorce are also "much less likely to say their   mother and father taught them how to pray and prayed with them -  and are much more likely to say they doubt the sincerity of 
         their parents' religious beliefs, do not share their parents'  values, and to say there are things their parents have done that they find hard to forgive." 
II. EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON SPOUSES
   A. MENTALLY.
      1. Men and women both suffer a decline in mental health following  divorce, but researchers have found that women are more greatly  affected. Some of the mental health indicators affected by  divorce include depression, hostility, self-acceptance, personal growth and positive relations with others
      2. A recent study found those who were unhappy but stay married were more likely to be happy five years later than those who divorced. 
   B. PHYSICALLY.
      1. Life expectancies for divorced men and women are significantly lower than for married people (who have the longest life expectancies) 
      2. The health consequences of divorce are so severe that a Yale  researcher concluded that "being divorced and a nonsmoker is [only] slightly less dangerous than smoking a pack a day and  staying married
      3. After a diagnosis of cancer, married people are most likely to  recover, while the divorced are least likely to recover, indicating that the emotional trauma of divorce has a long-term          impact on the physical health of the body.
   C. FINANCIALLY.
      1. Families with children that were not poor before the divorce see their income drop as much as 50 percent. Almost 50 percent of the parents with children that are going through a divorce move into poverty after the divorce.
      2. Studies show that women experiencing divorce face roughly a 30 percent decline in the standard of living they enjoyed while married and men show a 10 percent decline. The consistency of this finding caused one researcher to conclude: "However   'prepared' for marital disruption women increasingly may be,  they are not prepared in ways sufficient to cushion the economic cost." 
   D. SPIRITUALLY.
      1. Jesus taught there is only one ground for divorce and  remarriage:  fornication - Mt 19:9
      2. That divorce and remarriage for any other reason results in  adultery - Mt 19:9
      3. Those who divorce their spouses for a reason other than fornication, cause them to commit adultery! - Mt 5:32
         a. Either by putting them in a situation where they are likely  to commit fornication
         b. Or by putting them in a situation where they might enter an unscriptural marriage
      4. Those who commit fornication or adultery as a result of  unlawful divorce or remarriage will not inherit the kingdom of  heaven, unless they repent! - 1Co 6:9-11; Ga 5:19-21; He 13:4
CONCLUSION
1. Our purpose is not to pile guilt on those who are divorced.
   a. They know first-hand the terrible consequences of divorce on  their families and themselves
   b. They need our understanding and help to make the best of a difficult situation
2. Our prayer is this lesson will serve as a cautionary tale...
   a. That divorce is a treacherous and violent act for all those involved
   b. We need to teach our children what God has spoken and society is still learning about divorce
-May God help those suffering from the tragedy of divorce, and may God help us if we do not warn our families and our society of the terrible consequences of divorce...!

 

Last changed by Julius Soyinka on 23/10/2014

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    Igniting the Fire of Apostolic Signs and Wonders to Reconcile Men to Their Destiny in God.

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